Ralph
February 12, 2004 at 12:49 p.m.
A lot of people didn't know Ralph Price. Most don't even care about who he was. But I did and do. Ralph was a great man. The type that could easily bring a smile to your face. He was kind and generous and funny and loving. He was the type of man you afforded immortality to. I mean, how could such a wonderful man die? How would such a thing be possible? He makes too many people happy. But he has. Ralph Price was a cousin to my family. Probably second or third cousin really. But he was more like a grandfather to me. The closest thing to a grandpa I ever knew.I can remember when him and his wife, Jane, would show up at our house way back when I was a little girl. One of his favorite things to do was make balloon animals for all the little children. Even after his lungs lost the power to blow up the balloons, he went out and bought an air pump to do it for him. It never failed that when he was around, everyone had to smile. Ralph Price was a great man. Ralph Price is a great man.
I didn't get to say good bye to him. At first I blamed Crystal for it. I came back to the room after work, as I usually do, a little before 5:30. This is the time I normally shower on Wednesdays. But lo and behold she was in here with Robbie. Things grew increasingly uncomfortable in here for me so I finally decided to just go down and eat dinner. After dinner, I came upstairs with Jerrod and Rachel to discover that Crystal and Robbie were still in here. So I did as planned and just grabbed my coat. My dad had tried to call at 7, a time when I'm still supposed to be in the room reguardless of "who's day it is." No one answered the phone.
He was trying to call to tell me about Ralph being in the hospital. No one had told me of his horrible condition. I didn't even know he was in the hospital. Dad was also calling to tell me that it didn't seem likely Ralph would live through the weekend. I missed that call. I missed the opportunity to get Ralph's telephone number and call him. You know, to tell him that I love him. To tell him that he meant so much to me. I didn't get the opportunity to lend my support to Jane. And at first, like I said, I blamed Crystal. But now I look at it and realize that it's my own fault for not having the back bone to stay in the room until 7:30. I didn't have enough courage to stand up to Crystal and because of that, I didn't get to say goodbye.
I didn't get to talk to my dad until 12:20 last night. And that's when he told me everything about Ralph. That's when I got the phone number. I told Jerrod that I wanted to call Ralph the next day and that I'd be so grateful if he'd be here for me. He agreed being the awesome person that he is. But I won't get the chance now. Ralph passed away at 1:45 this morning. I didn't find out until mom called me at 8:30 though.
So, I went to bed thinking about death I suppose. Worrying about Ralph of course. And I was also a little worried aboutSwartz for unrelated reasons. This caused me to dream.
Swartz and I were trying to escape...probably from life's problems in general. We were just driving. We'd stop at houses and whatnot every now and then and sometimes the people would let us stay. I was watching as if though I were a third party or something. I'm not even sure what was happening, but the me that was with Swartz was getting sick.
One night, when we stopped, the people told us we could sleep in the barn. Being a cold night as it was, Swartz and I slept close to each other for heat. I died that night. Slipped quietly out of the life him and I were running from. But the me that was watching continued going. I came back to Transy, a ghost it would appear, and started telling me friends how I had died.
It was so....weird. I know the reason it was Swartz is because I think he needs to get away from things too. But I don't want to ponder on the other parts my dream. I don't want to know why I died.
I haven't really been able to stop crying since I finally woke up enough to realize what my mom had told me over the phone. I haven't been able to pull myself together enough for classes either. All I want is to curl up in my room and stay here. I just want to stay here and think about Ralph some more. About what made him that wonderful man who should have been immortal.
